Which story do you wish to live or let go off?
Intriguing question and one that catches my breath a wee bit. The story I wish to let go off is too sad to tell, a messy tangled up ball of threads, but I feel I can never let go of it as it is always there, woven in my life's frayed tapestry. But the newly stitched golden threads of life are begining to shine through more as time goes on and I do manage to pull and uncoil the tangled threads from it. At the best of times at least.
The story I wish to live however is no fairy tale, I feel I am starting to live it! I guess as I grow older in life I realise the term 'life is what you make it', to me at least would be true!
Please, do not get me wrong,I know my life to many would be boring, mundane and ordinary. I rarely venture out into the nightlife this great city has to offer. Big fella works late into the night and I work days, we are passing ships in the night at times and I am very much on my Tod after work. Though we live in a beautiful and enchanting place it is ruddy awkward to get to and my friends live far and we all lead very busy lives.
But this is the way I like to see it.
*I do not go out socialising the night life much. Why? Because I made up for a lifetime of it between the ages of 19-25. Trust me. I have been there, done that, and basically couldn't be bothered with it any longer!
OK then, to be honest, In work I help manage 75 children aged 0 - 5 daily. I rest my case. Not worth the hangover. Ever.
*Big fella and I do not see much of each other. Yeah, this can be a bit of a downer sometimes. He is very hard working, in charge of a shop open every day. But it is not all bad. I see him in the morning, he gets to pop out of work sometimes to give me a lift home and sometimes even a spot of dinner!(I know, how lucky am I!) and he goes to work and I am all alone. And I love it.
I don't know about you but if I can get it, I like my own space from time to time. I am quite a solitary person in a few ways. Even when I was a child I liked being on my own. (Ah, excuse me while I pull that tangled piece of gold thread of my sad story there.). When big fella toot toots his horn and drives away, I love to get to grips with the cleaning gear, organise bills and plan future days and take pictures now and then. Of course,once in a while I read a blog or two!
He is home in about four hours most nights and I have a cup of tea and a big hug for him when he arrives for now everything is done and I can sit with him in peace, tell him how I missed him and chat about our day! He sometimes brings me home sweets!He says he has a lovely time at work because he gets 'a rest'. So it works out nicely for both for now.Oh and Valentines day? He has always been working! I did hint every heavy in advance this year however. We shall see.
I live far away from friends and loved ones. Yeah, but I know every step they take on face book! My word, it is frightening how advanced technology and communication has advanced! I still end up acting like Father Dougal from Father Ted (TV show) when I am having web cam conversation with my friend in Australia saying " Wow, you're really there on screen! This isn't a tape recording or something is it? Is that really you?"
Australia! It's like she's around the corner!
There are so many ways to keep in touch these days. I do of course get up off my arse once in a while to visit friends and we love to have visitors over all the time!
Before you think I am a complete hermit, (I do like a good bit of food shopping, hahaha! I laughed while typing that) Once in a blue moon (literally) I go out for a good ole knees up. Like, this Friday I am heading out into the big bad world of the city centre for a celebratory birthday dinner and night out for a very good friend of mine and, ' bout same size as her' fella. No doubt we will have a barrel of wine with it and why not, after the meal, since their are nothing but bars open we may as well drink some more, dance and have a right laugh. It would be rude not to. It will be like a scene out of Ab Fab. I would obviously be Eddie, with the hair and all,when I really am kinda like her daughter in real life!
Big fella can not make it though. You guessed it, working! That's one that gets me down a bit. But I will enjoy myself, no less, for it is my friends birthday and it is a celebration of life! I just wish big fella was there to enjoy it too.
I wish to take on the bad times and battle on through with the surprises and uproars of life in the best way I can. I know if big fella and I ever had the arrival of the stork with a wrapped up bundle, this would all be a distance memory and I know I not even give this phase of my life a second thought. I probably would never have the time and it wouldn't matter.Our lives will take on a whole new adventure. Who knows what I will look back and think? I know this blog will probably be quite different too! Who knows where life is going to take us? I wish to carry on to the next page on my story of life for I know there are many twists and turns and crossroads to take. But I think it will be alright, for I am learning the skills of the circus soon!
Oh, and step out of the trance! That was a bit deep wasn't it? Wish Cast Wednesday's, it will do it to ya! I am going to go and put the kettle on for big fella, he will be home soon and I will get that stars in my belly feeling!